|
The phrase A ______ walks into a bar has provided the take-off point for an
uncountable number of jokes over the years. No matter what one’s
opinion is of bars, we hope that everyone can
appreciate the lessons in English grammar contained in the clever sentences
that follow:
A dangling participle walks into a bar. Enjoying a cocktail and chatting
with the bartender, the evening passes pleasantly.
A bar was walked into by the passive voice.
An oxymoron walked into a bar, and the silence was deafening.
Two quotation marks walk into a “bar.”
A malapropism walks into a bar, looking for all intensive purposes like a
wolf in cheap clothing, muttering epitaphs and casting dispersions on his
magnificent other, who takes him for granite.
Hyperbole totally rips into this insane bar and absolutely destroys
everything.
A question mark walks into a bar?
A non sequitur walks into a bar. In a strong wind, even turkeys can fly.
Papyrus and Comic Sans walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Get
out—we don't serve your type."
A mixed metaphor walks into a bar, seeing the handwriting on the wall but
hoping to nip it in the bud.
A comma splice walks into a bar, it has a drink and then leaves.
Three intransitive verbs walk into a bar. They sit. They converse. They
depart.
A synonym strolls into a tavern.
At the end of the day, a cliché walks into a bar—fresh as a
daisy, cute as a button, and sharp as a tack.
A run-on sentence walks into a bar it starts flirting. With a cute little
sentence fragment.
Falling slowly, softly falling, the chiasmus collapses to the bar floor.
A figure of speech literally walks into a bar and ends up getting
figuratively hammered.
An allusion walks into a bar, despite the fact that alcohol is its Achilles
heel.
The subjunctive would have walked into a bar, had it only known.
A misplaced modifier walks into a bar owned by a man with a glass eye named
Ralph.
The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense.
A dyslexic walks into a bra.
A verb walks into a bar, sees a beautiful noun, and suggests they
conjugate. The noun declines.
An Oxford comma walks into a bar, where it spends the evening watching the
television getting drunk and smoking cigars.
A simile walks into a bar, as parched as a desert.
A gerund and an infinitive walk into a bar, drinking to forget.
A hyphenated word and a non-hyphenated word walk into a bar and the
bartender nearly chokes on the irony.
|
|
View this article on our website
|
|
Free BONUS Quiz for You!
[[firstname]], because you are a subscriber to the newsletter, you get access to one of the Subscribers-Only Quizzes. Click here to take a Question Marks and Quotation Marks Quiz and get your scores and explanations instantly!
We will be adding many more quizzes this year to our already substantial list of quizzes. If you have suggestions for topics we have not yet covered, please send us a message at help@grammarbook.com.
|
Hundreds of Additional Quizzes
at Your Fingertips
Subscribe now to receive hundreds of additional English usage quizzes not found anywhere else!
For Instructors and Employers, you may assign quizzes to your students and employees and have their scores tallied and organized automatically! Let GrammarBook.com take the hassle out of teaching English!
"Fun to test my Skills"
"The explanations really help ... thanks!"
"I download the quizzes for my students who don't have computer access."
|
|
Don't need all the quizzes?
You can now purchase the same quizzes individually for ONLY 99¢ each.
Purchase yours here.
|
If you think you have found an error in a quiz, please email us at help@grammarbook.com
|
 |
The Blue Book of Grammar and Punctuation
by Jane Straus, Lester Kaufman, and Tom Stern |
The Authority on English Grammar! Eleventh Edition Now Available
An indispensable tool for busy professionals, teachers, students, homeschool families, editors, writers, and proofreaders.
Available in print AND as an e-Book! Over 2,000 copies are purchased every month!
The publisher of The Blue Book, Jossey-Bass, A Wiley brand, is offering a 35 percent discount for those of you who order the book through Wiley.com. Shipping and tax are not included. Simply go to bit.ly/1996hkA and use discount code E9X4A.
Offer expires December 31, 2018.
|
Wordplay
|
 |
English In A Snap:
68 One-Minute English Usage Videos FREE |
Learn all about who and whom, affect and effect, subjects and verbs, adjectives and adverbs, commas, semicolons, quotation marks, and much more by just sitting back and enjoying these easy-to-follow lessons. Tell your colleagues (and boss), children, teachers, and friends. Click here to watch.
|
|
